wordslacedwithgold™

I was free writing a couple nights ago with the thought in my mind that .. I can not say to my future husband that “he alone” will explore my “depth”. And it was just this sudden sadness that I wouldn’t be able to live the tradition of losing my virginity to my husband .. and it just made me wonder .. is he having sex with all the toxic beings that drained my sexual spirit. I instantly felt dirty and it scared me that for the first time in my life there was only one person walking this earth that I wanted to have the honor of being sexual with .. forever. I know we live in a new generation but it saddens me that the day I say “I do” .. I accept all your sexual past mysteries and vice versa. 

BTW I don’t regret losing my virginity .. I happen to enjoy and love sex (hello hormones).. I regret the fact I won’t be able to share my sexual acts (desires) with and only my future husband. 

My Piece.

I yearn so deeply to give you the best of me , but how can I when I’ve been touched in unmentionable ways .. I see why the tradition was “wait till your wedding day.!” .. this generation has transitioned to “you really gon make me wait 90 days.?” .. 

the last form of love is forgiveness , I want you to love me unconditionally that you forgive me for what I’m about to say .. my sexual spirit is ruined .. I detached it from love one day , when I saw sex and love play rough while puss and dog get along in loving ways .. hear me out , lend me your ear and forgive me as I say my sexual spirit sits in a dark corner crying away her wait to a non-white dress to be wed one day. 

Tiffany Ashley Verley Goldson